Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Forgive Me Father, For I have Blogged

It seems wherever I go, there I blog. Unfortunately, church is no exception and is just more fodder for blogging.

On Sunday, Father X began his lovely story about a bare fig tree and someone wanting to chop it down . I pray he is not on the blogosphere. If so, sorry Father X.

Where does my brain go during the Gospel of the Lord? Below is just a snippet of the conversation that followed in my head during 10 a.m. Mass.

"Hmm, figs. I know there is a recipe for either figs or dates and you wrap them in prosciutto with goat cheese. I think I saw it on either Barefoot Contessa, or maybe it was Giada who made them. It sounded weird to me at the time but the combo of flavors sounds good, sweet, salty, and creamy. What could be better? I really should try that. Michelle uses figs and dates a lot in her cooking. I wonder if "What would Brian Boitano Make" is on today. He's really fun to watch.

Oh, look over there, that nice lady has the worst sweater wedgie.

Wow, Nicolas could really use a haircut...he's starting to look like The Donald.

Ok, Holy Communion time. I really think they'd get a larger turnout here if they passed out little York Peppermint Patties instead of the wafer. Oy, what would Jesus think of that?"

I'm thinking I should go to confession next!


Anonymous said...

The few times I have been in church over the past couple of years my mind has wandered as well. Though I usually check out peoples rear ends during kneeling and standing portions, to see who has the most wrinkle resistant bottoms... Sorry God.

Anonymous said...

Just think of the poor people who have to "work" the mass and hear the homily 2-3 times in a week. Imagine what we... ummm. they think about.

Anonymous said...

Beck, you are a hoot! Sounds like me when I used to go. That's why I stopped going. I'll take my coffee and the paper on Sunday mornings instead, while I've got the gravy on.